I’m coming out guns blazing this morning!

I’m willing to bet you have felt the fear of failure before in your life. Maybe you tried to start a business, you wanted to ask that person out, you wanted to go back to school, but the fear of it not working out kept you in your lane. Sound familiar?

What happens when we feel that fear? We return to familiarity. We stay where we are in life because this is what we know. “The devil you know is better than the devil you don’t.”

Dressing is like this. Taking a chance on an outfit, investing in a big ticket item, trying out new brands, its all terrifying. So we stay here….

….having everything and nothing at the same time. But my friend, I am NOT here to give you the same old, “just take a chance on your wardrobe, fashion is art” nonsense. No. I am here to address another fear, and this is the real reason you stay in your lane. It is the reason you don’t try that new outfit, it’s the reason you say to someone, “I love that look, you can pull it off, but I can’t”. This reason is much more compelling than failure, failure is temporary, you can have a bad outfit on Tuesday and no one cares, get over it.

Listen, the reason you don’t take the chance is the fear of success. What if it DOES work out? What if everyone loved your outfit on Tuesday, they’ll expect another great outfit on Wednesday, and oh god, next week also! Then what, when you go to weddings will you be the person people can’t wait to see? Will you now be the fashionable person around the office? How will you maintain this? You only had one nice outfit!

This is the real fear. You don’t take chances because the escalation of success is overwhelming. Soon you’ll have to change your wardrobe from the rack above to this….

I am here to tell you that this fear is valid and probable if you don’t manage your expectations correctly. I’ve looked at my gym friends and seen how they count their macros and micros, weigh their food, carry protein shakes into restaurants and the whole thing annoys me. In the last 10 years I’ve lost 65 pounds. I’ve been to the gym a handful of times, I have way too much coffee on a regular basis, and eat sweets. But I did little things overtime that compounded into big results. I never wanted to be a fitness inspiration, and I’m not. No one thinks of me and weight loss. I made small adjustments in my life overtime that led me here, and I did the same with my wardrobe.

Years ago, I was all about short pants, loud socks, stupid haircuts, skintight outfits and purple shoes. Everyone was clamoring for more, more, more, but god it became unsustainable. On days I wanted to dress down, people looked at me like, “Oh god did you get fired?” The monster I had created got out of control.

> The way to take the steps toward building a desirable and ever-growing wardrobe, without losing control, is by adding in one item at a time gradually.

> Stop looking for the perfect outfit when you shop. This #OOTD (outfit of the day) nonsense is how we got in this mess. Fast fashion making it “affordable” to buy a whole new outfit every week and be a style icon. Start looking for the perfect piece, and then, another.

> Stop thinking of your wardrobe in extremes, dress vs casual, work vs weekend. The world is not like that anymore. Most companies are dress casual, so you should narrow your wardrobe and things should blend. Invest in jeans that can be worn to a pub and to work, and you will start to see the opportunities to look for another good pair of pants, and another.

Start to eliminate the extremes in your closet. The loud shirts, the rockstar outfits, the super-duper crappy t shirts. Narrow your existing wardrobe and look for opportunities to build upon.

The fear of success is quite real, but maybe you just need a Bard to help guide you along this journey.